HIRE ME, ADULT SWIM 💥

I have no manager. No agent. No shame.

I don't have a resume. I have 3 sketch videos.

I'm not asking. I'm transmitting.

This is not a pitch. It's a signal.

I'M OUT OF CREDITS AND OUT OF PATIENCE.
EVERY MINUTE YOU WAIT IS A LOST EPISODE.
TELL ME NO AND I'LL JUST GET WEIRDER.
THIS VIDEO CANNOT BE UNSEEN. HIRE ME.
THIS IS A CRY FOR HELP DISGUISED AS A JOB APPLICATION.
YOUR NEXT SHOW IS SITTING RIGHT HERE.
TRANSMISSION UNLOCKED: HIRE HIM NOW